Relationship Experts Swear By This Ancient Love Wisdom
We all know what a platonic friendship is, right? A nonsexual relationship. What about an Aristotelian friendship? What is that? Although you’ve likely never heard this term before, we believe it’s a concept everyone interested in romantic relationships should know about. So let’s dig into it now.
Aristotle holds that love is the greatest external good, and he says we tend to love three different kinds of things: those that are useful, those that are pleasurable, and those that are good. He claims, furthermore, that there is a kind of friendship that corresponds to each of these categories. Let’s take a look at each, in turn.
In this scenario, people may see in their relationship an opportunity for profit, often focusing on financial gain. They may, for example, decide to create a mutually beneficial business partnership. This kind of relationship, indeed, may be very profitable, Aristotle says, but he also points out problems that tend to arise with it. Since the whole basis of the friendship is what each person can get out of it, it is self-oriented and can quickly lead to quarrels if one or the other partner feels he or she is being shortchanged. And such quarrels often spell the end of friendships like these. If either partner feels the relationship is no longer useful to them, they will likely simply cut off the relationship and move on.
This type of friendship is higher than the first, Aristotle says, because friends who come together for profit may not actually enjoy spending time with each other. But friends who come together for pleasure are often witty and do actually enjoy each other’s company. They may, for example, like to get together on the weekends and go out for a good time on the town. Aristotle notes that these friendships can, indeed, be very pleasant, but he also observes that problems can quickly arise in these kinds of relationships, as well. As with friendships of utility, friendships of pleasure are also self-oriented, with the goal for each person being the pleasure they can get from it….
